Fonbestcedbagrapbanhigvan is a god.

It takes the form of a small, omniscient crow.

Fonbestcedbagrapbanhigvan created the Whirlpool Galaxy five million years ago.

If you believe in Fonbestcedbagrapbanhigvan, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Fonbestcedbagrapbanhigvan, it will send you a sign.

Fonbestcedbagrapbanhigvan's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Fonbestcedbagrapbanhigvan's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Fonbestcedbagrapbanhigvan three times a day.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Do not dye your hair magenta.

4. Aardvarks are not to be trusted.

5. Never think ill of sick tapirs.