Sisfigfarn is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, dishonourable crow.

Sisfigfarn created Africa two billion years ago.

If you believe in Sisfigfarn, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Sisfigfarn, it will turn you into a dog.

Sisfigfarn's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Sisfigfarn's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat onions.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Sisfigfarn must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Do not wear nickel on your body.

5. Never bounce near otters.