Bellpogvag is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, astonishing weasel.

Bellpogvag created water three million years ago.

If you believe in Bellpogvag, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bellpogvag, she will try to impress you with trees.

Bellpogvag's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Bellpogvag's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate eagles.