Hivgepmob is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, idiotic swallow.

Hivgepmob created a strange quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hivgepmob, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Hivgepmob, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Hivgepmob's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Hivgepmob's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Tapirs are not to be trusted.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Feed all hungry cats.

5. Never talk about black holes.