Flagbonkgep is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, overgenerous crow.

Flagbonkgep created vertebrates nine million years ago.

If you believe in Flagbonkgep, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Flagbonkgep, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Flagbonkgep's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Flagbonkgep's Holy Commandments

1. Birds are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Never think about moons.

4. You must never eat nuts.

5. Always obey Flagbonkgep's priests.