Kemladbom is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, blissful sheep.

Kemladbom created dark matter three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kemladbom, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Kemladbom, he will make you grow a tail.

Kemladbom's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Kemladbom's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never write about gravity.

5. Hide from pink ants for they are unholy.