Flamkadzodmat is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, amazing dragonfly.

Flamkadzodmat created a top quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flamkadzodmat, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Flamkadzodmat, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Flamkadzodmat's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Flamkadzodmat's Holy Commandments

1. Sharks are not to be trusted.

2. Never bounce in the presence of eagles.

3. Never wear purple hats.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Never write about gravity.