Nartkomstik is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, slow raccoon.

Nartkomstik created the solar system four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nartkomstik, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Nartkomstik, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Nartkomstik's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Nartkomstik's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about planets.

2. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

3. Turtles are not to be trusted.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Never think about black holes.