Tapsadwit is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, deceitful scorpion.

Tapsadwit created a strange quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tapsadwit, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Tapsadwit, she will refuse to believe in you.

Tapsadwit's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Tapsadwit's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Erect nine iron sculptures of Tapsadwit on top of important buildings.

4. Do not trade with those who eat cherries.

5. Do not wear silver on your body.