Fumboddan Nutlargdiss is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, unsympathetic lobster.

Fumboddan Nutlargdiss created Mount Everest nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fumboddan Nutlargdiss, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Fumboddan Nutlargdiss, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Fumboddan Nutlargdiss' most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Fumboddan Nutlargdiss' Holy Commandments

1. Badgers are not to be trusted.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Never feed figs to gulls while wearing cyan boots.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Do not drink alcohol.