Quatnegvag is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, idiotic badger.

Quatnegvag created carbon three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Quatnegvag, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Quatnegvag, it will turn you into a slug.

Quatnegvag's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Quatnegvag's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry dogs.

2. Always treat bats with great respect.

3. Never skip in holy places.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Do not cook food in pots.