Cedtinkar is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, almighty dove.

Cedtinkar created light two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cedtinkar, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Cedtinkar, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Cedtinkar's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Cedtinkar's Holy Commandments

1. Always help great tits in need.

2. Run away from purple dogs, for they are unholy.

3. Always make sure there are no pigs in a building before entering it.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Hide if seven moths approach from the west.