Vonkjenmisyarl is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, bad-tempered mouse.

Vonkjenmisyarl created the cosmos four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vonkjenmisyarl, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Vonkjenmisyarl, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Vonkjenmisyarl's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Vonkjenmisyarl's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the south.

2. Hide from fawn frogs for they are unholy.

3. Do not wear pink clothing.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Do not sit in public.