Bitcidzanpod is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, kind shark.

Bitcidzanpod created tapeworms six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bitcidzanpod, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Bitcidzanpod, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Bitcidzanpod's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Bitcidzanpod's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Always help sick snails.

3. Run away if six geese approach from the east.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Do not covet oxen.