Tapsinnurt Lanbonnar is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, emotional dove.

Tapsinnurt Lanbonnar created everything that exists four million years ago.

If you believe in Tapsinnurt Lanbonnar, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Tapsinnurt Lanbonnar, she will turn you into a dog.

Tapsinnurt Lanbonnar's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Tapsinnurt Lanbonnar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not bounce in public.

2. Never look at galaxies.

3. Worship no other gods but Tapsinnurt Lanbonnar.

4. You must love Tapsinnurt Lanbonnar.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.