Tonrulrap is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, quiet guinea pig.

Tonrulrap created everything that exists four million years ago.

If you believe in Tonrulrap, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Tonrulrap, he will refuse to believe in you.

Tonrulrap's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Tonrulrap's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh near tapirs.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.