Veenpignut is a god.

It takes the form of a small, contented walrus.

Veenpignut created a strange quark two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Veenpignut, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Veenpignut, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Veenpignut's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Veenpignut's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the south.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Do not trade with those who eat lentils.

4. You must pray to Veenpignut five times a day.

5. Always make sure there are no grasshopers in a room before entering it.