Flabrawhak is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, conceited cat.

Flabrawhak created the cosmos eight million years ago.

If you believe in Flabrawhak, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Flabrawhak, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Flabrawhak's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Flabrawhak's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

2. Do not take Flabrawhak's name in vain.

3. Hide from brown squirrels for they are unholy.

4. Never bounce in the presence of shrews.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.