Zodbess is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, dishonourable jaguar.

Zodbess created the cosmos eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zodbess, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Zodbess, she will come to you in dreams.

Zodbess' most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Zodbess' Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Never look at stars.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Feed all hungry cats.