Bedhotyok is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, loving owl.

Bedhotyok created the Whirlpool Galaxy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Bedhotyok, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Bedhotyok, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Bedhotyok's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Bedhotyok's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear trousers.

2. Bedhotyok loves aardvarks, so they must be respected.

3. Never go into yellow rooms.

4. Do not kill horses.

5. Never play with disobedient children.