Kancipgen is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, clever goblin.

Kancipgen created silver eight million years ago.

If you believe in Kancipgen, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Kancipgen, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Kancipgen's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Kancipgen's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about cell theory.

2. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Do not kill tortoises.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Always treat cats with great respect.