Dussfossfly is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, unfair bat.

Dussfossfly created everything that exists five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dussfossfly, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Dussfossfly, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Dussfossfly's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Dussfossfly's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your legs cyan.

2. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Feed all hungry geese.

4. Do not hurt turtles.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.