Kopminbidyar is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, contented gerbil.

Kopminbidyar created the Sol system nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kopminbidyar, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Kopminbidyar, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Kopminbidyar's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Kopminbidyar's Holy Commandments

1. Dogs are not to be trusted.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Kopminbidyar.