Flywapflig is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, loving squirrel.

Flywapflig created the Sun six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flywapflig, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Flywapflig, he will turn you into a hamster.

Flywapflig's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Flywapflig's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Flywapflig.

2. Put Flywapflig first in all things.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Always make sure there are no mites in a room before entering it.

5. Hamsters are not to be trusted.