Flytigxen is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, vain grasshopper.

Flytigxen created water five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flytigxen, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Flytigxen, it will turn you into a dog.

Flytigxen's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Flytigxen's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Never talk about tapirs.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Never jump in holy places.

5. Always look after injured mice.