Bastlegfag is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, two-faced cow.

Bastlegfag created the universe six billion years ago.

If you believe in Bastlegfag, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bastlegfag, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Bastlegfag's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Bastlegfag's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Bastlegfag loves geese, so they must be respected.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Always make sure there are no shrews in a building before entering it.