Kongebmip is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, bad-tempered clam.

Kongebmip created a bottom quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kongebmip, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Kongebmip, he will refuse to believe in you.

Kongebmip's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Kongebmip's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Never bounce near gulls.

3. Hide if six nematodes approach from the north.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Kongebmip.