Ripquilljip Gunvilcam is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, egotistical alligator.

Ripquilljip Gunvilcam created an electron seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ripquilljip Gunvilcam, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Ripquilljip Gunvilcam, it will turn you into a duck.

Ripquilljip Gunvilcam's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Ripquilljip Gunvilcam's Holy Commandments

1. Always help voles in need.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. You must never eat lentils.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Never bounce in holy places.