Nuttlanveg is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, calm ant.

Nuttlanveg created the Tadpole Galaxy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nuttlanveg, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Nuttlanveg, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Nuttlanveg's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Nuttlanveg's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Do not jump in public.

3. Do not wear carbon on your body.

4. Nuttlanveg must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Always stare at clouds.