Cemhatrull is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, unthoughtful otter.

Cemhatrull created the Virgo Supercluster two million years ago.

If you believe in Cemhatrull, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Cemhatrull, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Cemhatrull's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Cemhatrull's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Do not eat onions.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never run in the presence of nematodes.

5. Never hurt swans.