Dutyobmin is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, ruthless donkey.

Dutyobmin created life nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dutyobmin, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Dutyobmin, he will send minions to preach to you.

Dutyobmin's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Dutyobmin's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if three mice approach from the east.

2. Put Dutyobmin first in all things.

3. Never wear trousers.

4. Never talk about gravity.

5. Do not dye your hair indigo.