Dubcartinvad is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, cheerful aardvark.

Dubcartinvad created a top quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dubcartinvad, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Dubcartinvad, he will turn you into a mole.

Dubcartinvad's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Dubcartinvad's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured gulls.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Do not hurt foxes.

4. Never go into red rooms.

5. Dubcartinvad loves swans, so they must be honoured.