Bimkomnell is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, boastful cow.

Bimkomnell created an up quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Bimkomnell, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Bimkomnell, he will turn you into a frog.

Bimkomnell's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Bimkomnell's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Put Bimkomnell first in all things.

3. Never go into magenta rooms.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.