Quimfunnul is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, merciless sheep.

Quimfunnul created silver seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Quimfunnul, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Quimfunnul, she will turn you into a dog.

Quimfunnul's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Quimfunnul's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Never think ill of sick snakes.

3. Never paint your feet brown.

4. Quimfunnul loves otters, so they must be honoured.

5. Do not chop down trees.