Fetmoblik is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, all-knowing dog.

Fetmoblik created a strange quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fetmoblik, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Fetmoblik, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Fetmoblik's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Fetmoblik's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat cucumbers.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never write about asteroids.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.