Getdamcum is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, selfish toad.

Getdamcum created the Cigar Galaxy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Getdamcum, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Getdamcum, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Getdamcum's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Getdamcum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Retreat if four capybaras approach from the north.

3. Hide from cyan snakes for they are unholy.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. You must love Getdamcum.