Vigditzess is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, awesome crab.

Vigditzess created light nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vigditzess, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Vigditzess, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Vigditzess' most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Vigditzess' Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick seals.

2. Run away from white tortoises, for they are unholy.

3. Worship no other gods but Vigditzess.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never talk about fire.