Dotbagfitwit Dissfobnig is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, temperamental mole.

Dotbagfitwit Dissfobnig created the solar system six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dotbagfitwit Dissfobnig, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Dotbagfitwit Dissfobnig, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Dotbagfitwit Dissfobnig's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Dotbagfitwit Dissfobnig's Holy Commandments

1. Erect eight copper sculptures of Dotbagfitwit Dissfobnig on top of important buildings.

2. Never mention voles.

3. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Pray towards the east.