Dunzodhon is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, blissful clam.

Dunzodhon created the planet Jupiter three billion years ago.

If you believe in Dunzodhon, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Dunzodhon, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Dunzodhon's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Dunzodhon's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce near dogs.

2. Never feed tomatoes to sheep while wearing magenta tights.

3. Feed all hungry bats.

4. Worship no other gods but Dunzodhon.

5. Never talk about cell theory.