Narlfithit is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, staggering octopus.

Narlfithit created humankind eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Narlfithit, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Narlfithit, she will cry a lot.

Narlfithit's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Narlfithit's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never go into fawn rooms.