Gemmilvag is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, clever yak.

Gemmilvag created parasitic wasps nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gemmilvag, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Gemmilvag, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Gemmilvag's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Gemmilvag's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Never wear mauve skirts.

3. Do not speak about oranges.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.