Dissbidarf is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, confident tortoise.

Dissbidarf created parasitic wasps nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dissbidarf, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Dissbidarf, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Dissbidarf's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Dissbidarf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Dissbidarf's name in vain.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Dissbidarf loves sheep, so they must be respected.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate rats.

5. Never run in the presence of nematodes.