Zak Vonkpantar is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, astonishing mouse.

Zak Vonkpantar created dark energy twelve years ago.

If you believe in Zak Vonkpantar, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Zak Vonkpantar, he will turn you into a plant.

Zak Vonkpantar's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Zak Vonkpantar's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Never laugh in holy places.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never think about galaxies.