Vonkhogrot is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, clever monkey.

Vonkhogrot created silver eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vonkhogrot, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Vonkhogrot, it will make you grow a tail.

Vonkhogrot's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Vonkhogrot's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in the presence of manatees.

2. Always make sure there are no turtles in a building before entering it.

3. Vonkhogrot loves badgers, so they must be honoured.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Always take life seriously.