Futfidligarnpag Sakhugdim is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, impressive otter.

Futfidligarnpag Sakhugdim created tapeworms nine million years ago.

If you believe in Futfidligarnpag Sakhugdim, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Futfidligarnpag Sakhugdim, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Futfidligarnpag Sakhugdim's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Futfidligarnpag Sakhugdim's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never sing in holy places.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Never talk about gravity.