Gamkipfat is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, confident faun.

Gamkipfat created carbon three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gamkipfat, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Gamkipfat, she will destroy your home planet.

Gamkipfat's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Gamkipfat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair indigo.

2. Hide if eight doves approach from the east.

3. Never eat bark.

4. You must pray to Gamkipfat nine times a day.

5. Do not cook food in pots.