Hinstigbiss is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, emotional shark.

Hinstigbiss created matter four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hinstigbiss, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Hinstigbiss, she will boil you in a big pot.

Hinstigbiss' most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Hinstigbiss' Holy Commandments

1. Always help whales.

2. Always help sick goats.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never think about black holes.

5. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.