Didbedjatpid is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, humorless walrus.

Didbedjatpid created a down quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Didbedjatpid, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Didbedjatpid, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Didbedjatpid's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Didbedjatpid's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed figs to porpoises while wearing yellow tights.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Always help sick manatees.

4. Didbedjatpid loves sharks, so they must be honoured.

5. Worship no other gods but Didbedjatpid.