Xinlarplab is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, intelligent unicorn.

Xinlarplab created the universe three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Xinlarplab, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Xinlarplab, it will turn you into a slug.

Xinlarplab's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Xinlarplab's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about moons.

2. Do not laugh in public.

3. Put Xinlarplab first in all things.

4. Always wear black.

5. Always pray immersed in water.