Yokxucpin Poppagwadtig is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, humorless slug.

Yokxucpin Poppagwadtig created a bottom quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Yokxucpin Poppagwadtig, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Yokxucpin Poppagwadtig, it will turn you into a slug.

Yokxucpin Poppagwadtig's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Yokxucpin Poppagwadtig's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Yokxucpin Poppagwadtig eight times a day.

2. Hide from purple geese for they are unholy.

3. Shrews are not to be trusted.

4. Do not take Yokxucpin Poppagwadtig's name in vain.

5. Never talk about gravity.